Crappy Carp

I joined PlentyOfFish.com last week. Literally within minutes of creating my account, I received a message from "RomanceTogether".

"Hello, You are drop dead gorgeous. I read your profile and find you to be down to earth. I would love to have a chance to meet you. How about going out for a coffee tonight or sometime this week? Hope to hear back from you."

I wrote him back saying that I'd read his profile and noticed he had children. I am looking for someone without kids (been there, done that). He wrote me back with, "Thank you for taking the time to read my profile and for writing back. That speaks volumes about the person you are. Take care and God Bless You".

How nice!

I read through few profiles and found one "SpiritMale" that seemed interesting. There was a line in his profile that said he made a "mean pasta". That made me chuckle. I sent him a message asking if he could make pasta in other moods other than "mean".

He wrote me back and from there we exchanged a few more messages before exchanging numbers.

He called me on Friday and asked me out. Right on! The plan was to meet for drinks after work, around 6ish.

I got to the designated meeting spot at 6:05pm and my first instinct was to walk right past him. When we said hello, my second instinct was to run screaming in the other direction.

We changed venues from drinks to sushi. And my inner voice was still screaming "RUN AWAY". As we sat down to dinner, everything took a turn to total crap.

He criticized my hat, my POF profile, my choice in drink (water, rather than saki) and told me he once dated a girl who treated her cats like humans, which in his opinion, is totally ridiculous.

The date lasted an hour flat. I thanked him and gave him a hug goodbye. As we were parting, he commented on what a great time he had with me and wanted to see me again. Yeah right. RUN AWAY!!

He messaged me later and asked me to a movie. I wrote him back thanking him again for dinner and that I would not want to take him up on the movie offer. He asked me why so I wrote him back with this:

"You criticized my profile again, which made me wonder why you even bothered to meet me.

You kept harping on my hat. It was a hat. I like hats. I don't get why it bothered you that I was wearing one. And I don't get why I had to explain why I was wearing a hat. Did I ask you why you were wearing pants? Or a coat? Or those particular shoes? I wore that hat on that particular day because I wanted to. Much like everything else I do on a daily basis, because I feel like it.

You questioned my taste in alcohol and you questioned why I wasn't having any alcohol with dinner. I think my tastes are my tastes and I felt like you were judging me.

You ridiculed a girl you dated for treating her cats like humans. My profile says I love my cat. I love him like a person. I love him enough that I have his initial tattooed to my collarbone. So when you said you thought it was ridiculous for that girl to love her cats so much, it was insulting to me as well.

And you kept making a joke about me being a guy. Yes, I enjoy things that are traditionally classified as male activities, but you made that joke like 3 times. It was funny the first time, mildly amusing the second time, and insulting the third time. You made me feel like I had zero femininity.

So I hope that gives you some insight."

He wrote me back with an apology. And that was that.

And since him, I've had one or two guys talk to me, but none have asked me out. Which is the problem that plagues me over and over. The only man who has ever asked me out on a date is my ex-husband. And we all know how that turned out.

I think I'm going to delete my profile. I know that a week isn't really a good measure of what the site has to offer. Given the fact that the site boasts over 900,000 active daily users, half of whom I will assume to be men, I've already struck out.

The universe keeps showing me that I am not meant to be with anyone.