Lava Flow

I opened a Lavalife account last night. I was on Lava about 6 years ago with disastrous results. The guys I met would either be at least 10 years older than their pictures, or they were only looking to molest me for a night.

I am hoping this has changed, now that the age range of men I'm interested in has had a few years to mature. Wait, did I just use the word mature when referencing the male species? I must still be drunk from New Year's Eve.

So in the 16 hours I've been on Lava again I have noticed a few things which have not changed. The first is guys still do not have any clue on what a good profile picture should be. It's either a shot of them from the side, a shot of them not smiling from the side, or one of them really faaaaaar awaaaaaaaaaay because they needed to get the whole mountain in the shot.

The second is there are ridiculously hot guys with profiles. If a guy is ridiculously hot, he does not need to go online for dating opportunities. Just walk out your front door and smile and I'm sure a line up will start. And the profiles these guys have might as well say, "I'm ridiculously hot, so you should be too!" They must be crazy assholes to be so hot and not be in a relationship.

And the third is that every Asian guy on there is wearing a suit in his profile picture. No offense to my Asian brothers, but really? Is this supposed to perpetuate the stereotype that Asians are smarter than everyone else on earth, and therefore have super high paying jobs in either the financial or technology sectors, and therefore are able to purchase and wear high priced suits for casual Sunday lounging at the cottage? Yeah.

I think I'm gonna be shutting down my Lava account faster than my PoF account.